11/30/2012 9:59:00 PM Column: Military beefs up with new Fat Army
By ARGUS HAMILTON Syndicated Columnist
BEVERLY HILLS - God bless America, and how's everybody?
The Pentagon released fitness data showing that one in four young people is too fat to serve in the U.S. military. Obesity is a national security concern. We either need to get in shape or recruit a separate fat army that only invades countries that don't have hills.
The Powerball jackpot hit five hundred million dollars Thursday when two winning tickets came up. They'll split it. Every year the lottery creates a few new Republicans but it is no match for the number of Democrats produced by televised Republican debates.
Lindsay Lohan was arrested Tuesday for punching a lady at a New York nightclub. She's had four arrests and three car wrecks this year. People in Hollywood are worried that her lifestyle is draining her looks, but not everyone takes as good a mug shot as Mel Gibson.
The NFL suspended two Seattle Seahawks for testing positive for Adderall. They will try anything. Some NFL players have been accused of taking Viagra to give themselves a performance edge, except Tony Romo who missed his mouth and the pill fell incomplete.
New York's mayor urged office building owners to allow bicycles on elevators to encourage Manhattanites to bicycle. Every local area has its own solution to transit problems. Here in Los Angeles they're working on a plan that will require people to drive two cars to work.